Why I'm going to go postal soon (or why I feel like Bartleby the Scrivener)

To the company to which my services are currently being contracted, technical documentation is not a place for the users to learn how to perform a procedure, but instead a universal dumping ground for information they cannot find a good home for elsewhere. My coworker has dubbed it the "CYA documentation" (as in "cover your ass"). And it's totally true. I realize it's companies like this that make everyone hate technical manuals, not the writers themselves. If the writers were left to their craft--as I was in my last company--you would see a far better quality of manuals produced.

So, yesterday, my email inbox at work contained a string of messages of a conversation between an engineer, the project manager, and a very annoying quality assurance technician while I was out enjoying the Indians home opener on Monday (which was at 3:05, so I'd only worked a half day). Basically, the gist of the messages was that the quality assurance tech had found a new function of the equipment she was not aware of. So, it spurred this electronic debate over whether or not this had been covered in the manuals, and even, into which manuals it belonged (at this company, we have service manuals for our internal service technicians and user manuals for our customers, which is the group I work for).

Well, at the very end of the message was a prompt to create a defect against the current user and service manuals to ensure this new information is included. A defect is a "problem" discovered in the machinery or anything to do with the machinery, such as documentation. A quality assurance, customer service, field service, or any other technician or employee who discovers a problem writes a defect or else nothing else happens. We attend these [boring] meetings once a week throughout a project where all of the newly submitted defects are read and assigned to the appropriate people to either fix or determine the source of the issue and resubmit so that the team can determine what to do next. It's a long, drawn out process because this company is regulated by a government agency, which results in lots of paperwork to create audit trails. It's just what a creative, free-spirited artist such as myself absolutely despises about the corporate world.

Anyway, the real kicker to this whole situation is that I documented this feature two months ago! How? I, um, READ THE DESIGN DOCUMENT! A novel concept, I know. Go figure, a technical writer reading the engineering design specification to ensure that all of the new features of the system are captured in the manual. How else would anyone expect me to know what to write about? No one in this whole god-forsaken company ever tells me anything. The only way I've been able to write about anything in this project is to find the engineers responsible for the new changes, which sometimes involves a lot of digging. Even amongst all these guidelines and procedures for, God knows, EVERYTHING else, no one has written a procedure into their elaborate flow charts that includes an instruction such as, "Please inform the technical writer assigned to this project that the feature is ready to be documented."

I have never worked for a company that disrespects technical writers to the level that this company does. It's absolutely infuriating. There's very little room for creativity or personal insight and knowledge on writing effective technical documentation because when you try to explain that, oh, for example, putting a huge paragraph right in the middle of a procedure will only cause frustration to the user, someone tells you that it's imperative the user is aware of every contingency possible within that procedure. Trust me, though, I could find a lot better ways to accomplish clarity if people actually let me think in this job. The problem with the documentation in this company is that everyone has their fingers in it. They just don't give the writers the information and let them work their magic. There are days here where I feel like I'm just a high paid secretary, inserting edits doled out to me by some engineer who thinks he commands the English language better than me.

All of this, of course, makes me miss my old company. At my old company, my boss respected me. I had complete creative control over the documentation set for which I was responsible. My old boss told me what needed to be written and by when, and then just let me find the people and get the information and format it according to my expertise and knowledge of technical documentation. He praised my work numerous times and told me during my annual reviews that I had exceeded his expectations for me. In fact, I got a lot of praise at that company, even at the expense of the other technical writer who had worked there for five years longer than I had. (They told me that I was better than him, which made me feel bad, but I did take pride in the knowledge.)

I left my former company because lay-offs were occuring every couple of weeks. The day after my interview with the contracting company for which I currently am employed, they laid off the other technical writer in favor of me. I felt horrible about this, especially since I knew that I had one foot out the door. Also, the Northeast Ohio technical writing community is quite small and I was afraid that being chosen over the senior technical writer during a lay-off would blacken my name with my colleagues. My boss had assured me that they would always need one technical writer at the very least and that my job was secure. I should have stayed. I guess I just thought my current opportunity would be better.

The thing is, I was sure that working for a contracting company would solve a lot of the boredom problems I have when I become an expert with one product. I envisioned being rotated around to a lot of other companies to try my hand at bits and pieces of other industries and products I never tried. I thought it would bolster my resume, allow me to learn a new skill other than technical manuals, perhaps give me the chance to create an e-learning training course or something. I guess I didn't understand, even though it was conveyed to me, that I'd be stuck at the same paper-laden corporate hellhole I've been stuck in for the last year.

What peeves me off about this whole incident yesterday is that no one bothered to ask me if I was aware of this new feature. Oh, they added me to the email conversation all right. But did anyone say, "Gee, MG, are you documenting this new feature?" Instead, they decided to submit a defect against the manual--a work in progress at this point since the project is only in its early stages--assuming that I was too ignorant to realize the feature was there (even though it is spelled out clearly in the design document). How can you have a problem with something that's not released yet? It's understandable if there's some incorrect information in the manual that has been there since some prior release, but this is a new feature, something that hasn't even been placed in the official manual yet. Furthermore, assuming I was not aware of the feature, why couldn't they have just sent me an email or called me to tell me to ensure I include it in the manual, rather than go through the whole process of submitting a defect?

The real kicker is that I've had PDFs of the topics I've already completed sitting out in the project folder on our shared network. I told everyone in a meeting about three weeks ago that these rough drafts are there for review; the project manager told everyone two weeks ago that he wants them to read and comment on the rough drafts by the next project meeting (this Friday). Did anyone bother to look at these documents before whipping off that email? Obviously not! And these are the same people who have demanded that the manuals be pre-reviewed prior to the next official review phase. If they were so hot to get their hands on these documents before they are submitted for official review, how come no one has bothered to review or even look at them yet?

I am just exasperated. I know this seems like a tiny incident to be bitching about, but it's the most recent in a huge pile of completely moronic actions. I am so tired of all the paperwork and procedures here. I'm tired of people with engineering degrees telling me how to write a manual and managers deciding that every possible procedure a customer might do be documented (above and beyond the basic procedure). I'm tired of useless bits of information being added to the manual because no one knows where else to put it.

The manuals for the product are completely useless. They are full of redundant information and over-regulated dribble. Should you actually believe information valuable to you exists in the manual, you have no way of locating it because there is no index. No one wants to trouble themselves with creating index tags in the documents because it takes "too much time." (This is a task, I would like to point out, I actually enjoy). There are no figure numbers or table numbers to use as reference.

The entire manual set consists of six 8x8 volumes, about 400-500 pages each. I don't know whose brilliant idea it was to have manuals at an 8x8 but the "cute" pocket-size notion is completely obliterated by the sheer thickness of the manuals. They make great paperweights on a desk, that's for sure; they would undoubtedly hold down important papers in a tornado.

I've spent the last couple days trying to fix a 94-page chapter, lamely named "system description," that has been the dumping area for information no one has previously known what to do with. Somehow, I managed to find appropriate chapters for these topics. I'm suspecting, however, that changing the placement of these topics is going to get some people's underwear in a twist because change in this company equals "bad." This is the way it's been, this is the way it will stay, dammit.

It's just a mess. I personally feel like they should trash the entire manual set and start over. Of course, that's not the most efficient way to do things and I need to just have patience. Perhaps the real problem is that I don't like working on material that has been written by other people. Even too many writers have touched these manuals at this point and I really am frustrated by what seems to me as haphazard organization. I pity the customers. They can't possibly like this company's documentation much...

I don't know. I thought I was past the point of caring. I had told myself to just sit tight and be the mindless automaton they desired. It's getting frustrating, though. I feel like my creative talents should be put to better use. I have been a little disenchanted with technical writing for the last several years, but never more so than I am now. I think before it was more a matter of feeling as though I were pouring my heart and soul into a document that so few people actually read cover to cover as it was written. Yet, when I think back, I realize that perhaps I took for granted the good thing I had going at my last company, with my last boss, where I had all the creative expression I wanted (within the confines of technical writing, that is) and I at least had respect from my coworkers, even when they said, "Well, what does it matter? No one reads these things!"

It mattered to me, though. And I knew someone was reading them. At my last company, I brought an entire set of manuals to a line of machinery that previously had none. As I released each new manual, my coworkers in the customer-facing departments were really happy. I did get some feedback from customers and suggestions for topics to include. I had a sweet thing going because even though everyone said no one reads the manuals, I knew that some people did. I had a lot of respect among my coworkers and I feel I earned it because I had built relationships with them. The reason my manuals were so good was because I was more personable than the other technical writer. I was able to use my extrovert nature to make people comfortable with me. Yeah, I did a little b.s.ing with the shop guys, but when I needed to get down to business, I did.

That other company was small. I have a theory that when a company reaches over 200 people, it hits "maximum capacity" for a warm, personal environment and the pleasure to work there is sucked right out. With bigger companies comes more paperwork, more guidelines, less room for free thought. I don't like to work at places where I'm just an employee number in a big pool of worker-bees. I like to stand out for the job I do and I like to know all my coworkers. Maybe it's narcissistic (which we all know I am). I went to a small college for the same reasons. I attend a small church (well, not so small anymore, as it has hit 200 members). I thrive in environments where I feel I'm personally contributing to and making a difference in the community. If I work for a huge company, I feel like I'm just cranking out product for some faceless entity and my heart isn't in it. I need to know that what I produce actually makes it into a customer's hands and is appreciated. I like to know who the "big man" is in charge. Even if I have nothing to say to him, I like him to eat least know I exist.

I know I can't go back to my old company. I screwed that situation up rightly. I guess, though, maybe in the long run where I'm at will turn out to be the right move. My dad says I have "the grass is always greener on the other side" syndrome. I guess he's right, for I do the same thing with Colorado--I was there, I came back, and now I bitch about having left. I just wish I could find that "happy spot" where everything is at least okay enough that I don't want to complain about it. Maybe next time I have a job with a boss who highly respects my work, I'll appreciate it more. Or maybe I won't. I seem to have trouble learning my lesson.