Unitarian Universalist Jokes

Always one to laugh at myself and all that I hold sacred, I've decided to share a few UU jokes with you that I recently heard. These are pretty simple.

Q: What do you get when you cross a Unitarian Universalist with a Jehovah's Witness?
A: Someone who knocks on your door to talk about nothing.

Q: What is a Unitarian Universalist?
A: An atheist with kids.

Har har! Now if you're getting those jokes, you need to check out this website I just found that generates a joke each time you click the link. They just gave me some good ones, like the following:

A man was being given a tour of Hell by the Devil. "This is the area where we keep people who have violated the food taboos of their religion", the Devil said. "Behind this first door are the Catholics. These are the ones who ate meat on Friday. Behind the second door are the Jews. They all ate pork. Behind the third door are the Unitarians." The man looked puzzled. The Devil clarified, "They didn't partake of tofu, hummus, or free-trade coffee."

This strikes me as particularly funny, even in my short experience with UUism, because my church sells free-trade coffee in their basement during coffee hour.

Oh, here's another good one:

Q: How many UUs does it take to change a light bulb?
A: An undetermined number. We choose not to make a statement either in favor of, or against, the need for a light bulb. However, if on your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, that's fine. You are invited to form a committee, write a poem or compose a modern dance about your bulb for next Sunday's service, during which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life, and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.
(From "Solitaire, Poker and Seeing God" by Roger Peltier, 3/14/04, and as quoted from personal correspondence with Joan Goodwin.)

And another relevant one:

UU Prayer: "Dear God, if there is a God, if you can, save my soul, if I have a soul."

And people question that this is the right faith for me? Pa-shaw, I say! Okay, I'll let you generate your own now.